I AM LOST..
...written on Thursday, Oct. 14, 2004, @ 4:34 p.m.
somehow i feel that the mob trip gonna be over soon and after that, the empty feeling will start to consume me bit by bit. suppose to be doing my presentation preparation now but dunno wads gone into me. i am take up my pen to write or create some powerpoint slides. com is lagging, having headache. everything kinda sucked.
maybe a bath will lightened up my mood. maybe i need to ask God for help. maybe i should take a rest from all these crap.
about this empty feeling.....
its like very soon, me and eliel wun be buddies anymore, there won't be such thing called the MOB guys fellowship, no longer having so much stayovers, no nothing. after getting involved in so much things, life will be back to the slow moving pace. is that how things are suppose to be? moving from fast pace to slow pace aren't suppose to be that hard. then y am i feeling this way? i know i shld just enjoy wadeva that i have now. then y am i feeling this way?
i feel as though things gonna be very different after MOB. the depth of a relationship is measured by the amount of time a person is willing to spend on it. I THINK THIS MUST BE IT!! God is telling me to spend more time with HIM. yeah tts it! i haven been spending time with God. so tts y alot of mixed thoughts, alot of depressions and stuff. God has always been the pillar of my life. without Him, my life crumbles. it is when after going through all that confusion and mindless thoughts that make me realise how much I need God in my life.
its good to have a blog like this. after listing everything down, it'll be so much easier to think. yes, i have a direction to go now. till then!!